me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
You know, be my cock's hype man.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
