I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
