he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
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