I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
