I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
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