is your mom at the bar?
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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