At least make sure they are 18
Why
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Randomize
