did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
