what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
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