i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
