I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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