smell my finger.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize
