thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Randomize
