We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
