i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I need water and some morals
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
