Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
she smelled like a LAN party
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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