i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Farmville is her only friend.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
