Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize
