is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
Four minutes until I can fart!
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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