No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize
