I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
