doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Houston, we have a squirter
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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