do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
i now understand why vodka
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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