I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
be right there i have to get my cape
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
