Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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