My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Randomize
