the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
