i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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