THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
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