Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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