I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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