Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
