I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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