i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
you never un-have a 4some
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
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