Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Actions speak louder than pants.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Randomize
