I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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