Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
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