I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I think people are normalizing furries
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Randomize
