I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Randomize
