He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
