New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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