so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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