Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
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