I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
