They should really pass out barf bags in church
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
