Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
As shirtless as possible
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I have grass duct taped all over my body
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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