just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
