...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
