Pappa wants mamma naked
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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