idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
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